A busy Mother's Day weekend

4 years ago, I had a Mother's day that would top any other. I held my tiny huge (9 lbs 3 oz) 2 day old baby in my arms still in the hospital. My hubby brought the girls up to hang out with us, my mom and dad came up, and my sister and her family came in town to visit. It was kinda like a birthday party for my girl right there in the hospital. She even got to have her first sleep over. My sister was given permission to spend the night with her son who was just 4 weeks old. They were due just 1 day apart, but her son got impatient and came 5 weeks early and for the first time, my child came 1 week early on her scheduled C- section date.

That night in the hospital with my sister and our 2 babies was one of the best nights of my life. We talked and laughed (which hurt my stomach, but was so worth it). She is truly my best friend. I am so thankful we are as close as we are.

God knew what he was doing when I had Alyssa though..... My first 2 kids were 5.5 and 4.5 weeks early.... Waiting until 39 weeks with a huge 9 lb baby who was breech felt like torture. We arrived at the hospital for my scheduled C-section, but a few emergencies came in and bumped ahead of us. Finally, we went back to the OR.

Can I just tell you that it is NEVER a good thing when a doctor cuts open your stomach and gasps..... Well it turns out that my uterus was literally torn to shreds.... The only thing keeping Alyssa and I alive was the sac of water that should have broken (it did with my other 2). The doctor told my husband and I that if my water had broken, Alyssa would have been exposed to air and then suffocated and the amount of water I had would have flooded my organs.... So thankful God was in control.

Before we knew any of this, just seconds after my child had been taken from the room, the doctor looked over the sheet and asked if he could please tie my tubes. My response was no, I want more kids!

It took 2 doctors over an hour to stitch my uterus back together.... I kept hearing things like, "it is not holding" "it keeps tearing" "should we just remove it" "have you ever seen anything like this before"

I was starting to get concerned because at this point the whole thing had not yet been explained to me.

As I was being wheeled from the OR (once they finally got me all sewed and stapled back together), they were wheeling my baby towards me. Her blood sugar was low and she needed to eat right away. They wheeled me into some nurses break room or some tiny room... not sure exactly what it was, so I could feed her. She ate like a champ and her blood sugar went up. I was so relieved. Then when I arrived in my room, the doctor came in and explained that I should not have anymore kids, but if I decided to have more children I needed to wait a minimum of 4-5 years to allow my uterus to fully heal.

Well, my Angel just turned 4 this past week, and guess what?? I am expecting.. Twins.... They are definitely not identical, but they are both 6 years old. See and that doctor said I would never have any more kids.

We celebrated Alyssa's birthday this weekend and had a lot of fun.

A very awesome friend of mine brought a card for Adam and Matthias too.

One of them has a birthday the day after Alyssa's :)

My bro and sis in law brought a balloon and gift for Alyssa on her actually birthday and surprised me the next day by bringing cupcakes and a balloon so we could celebrate my son's birthday too.

For someone who has not gone through the process, she got what I needed that day.

Just to know that other people love and care about him too. I cannot wait until he is home so he can see and feel that love.

Alyssa's birthday was fun and quite a bit of family and friends came out to support her. Some good friends even came in from Nevada and my sister and her family came in from Idaho.

Picture overload coming!!

 She there on the left?? That is my nephew and my cousin's girl. They were cracking me up. They were holding hands....

 Then he took his shirt off and they went on a ride together lol.

 Kevin was blaming the older boys for using a bucket to get the patio soaked.... He took the bucket away, so Alyssa went and grabbed the one that holds our bath toys.... I took the following pictures to show her daddy later LOL

 Cake time!!!

 See how the front of the cake is all messed up? I may have walked away and her Poppy may have taken videos of her using the stick from the candle to eat some of the cake.... Bad Poppy.

 Presents!!! She was spoiled rotten!!!!

 She was just flinging things everywhere :)

 Uncle Troy calls her Turtle and she gets so mad LOL So, we all buy her turtles.

 See that little baby?? He stayed at my house..... It reminded me of how badly I miss when my kids were little. His older brothers made me want my boys home right now!!

 Time for the big kids (men) to pick on the younger kids...

 Kait loving on her Uncle (he is one of our closest friends) Craig

 Billy took a break from picking on the kids to play some catch with some of the littles.

 All in all it was a great day that wore out birthday girl out...... she fell asleep on the kitchen floor :)

Today was a great day too. Hubby brought me some breakfast in bed (toast and milk, but hey better than nothing lol). We went to church. Then we went to Lagoon with my family. Not something we would normally do on a Sunday, but my sister was here from out of town..... you make sacrifices some times.

We left Lagoon and went to Kev's parents for dinner. They moved in Saturday :) We ate dinner then stayed until after 10pm helping them put their living room together.

We also had my cousin's wedding reception on Saturday and on Friday we went to dinner with my sister and mom. The best thing happened while we were at Dennys. A lady wished us Happy Mother's Day which got us talking. They were talking about how many kids they all had (3 each). I couldn't help it. I said "I have 5 kids ages 8,6,6,6 and 4." Her mouth dropped open and she slowly said WOW. I loved it. Made my entire day :)

I miss my boys like crazy, but I have to remember that just like Alyssa's birth, God knows what he is doing and they will be home soon :)

Missing you on your Birthday!!

My son, my precious child.

Today is your special day. A day we celebrate your birth!

Today, I am thankful to your birth mom and dad for having you.

I do have one regret though..... That you are spending this day alone.

Never again son!

Never again will your special day go unnoticed.

Mommy will be back to get you soon.

Tears stream down my face as I think of what this day holds for you..... nothing..... same as every other day.

Your Gma is not even with you today.

Will she come in special to see you?

Does she even know today is your birthday?

Will anyone kiss you today and tell you that you are loved?

Right now you are waking up and eating breakfast. 

Then you will probably lay in your bed for 4 hours until your next meal.

That same thing will happen 5 times today, but nothing more.

You will not be held, rocked, sang to or loved.

I am sorry, my son.

I wish I had a way to let you know that we are thinking of you.

We miss you.

We want you home.

I have your room mostly ready.

I think you are going to love it.

I am working hard to get all the money I need to fly back and get you.

Right now we are doing an ipad mini giveaway. I was hoping to pick a winner on your birthday, but we still need 25 more people. 

I know a lot of people love you and are excited to help us bring you home.

Soon, my son, I will hold you again soon :)

God please soothe my heart this day.

Please help me to get some rest.

Please help my son to feel loved.

Please help me to get my boys home quickly. 

Boys' room

In order to pass the time, I have been trying to get the boys' room all ready.

I am not a big decorator. In fact, I stink at it.

I have never been a big theme person.

Since I wanted to find a way to say thank you to all of you, I went with a jungle theme.

It goes with our name wall and I centered the room around that.

 This is the outside of their door.

 The accent wall.

 Matthias' bed

 Thanks to some awesome friends and my parents, it looks like boys live here.

Adam's clothes

 Matthias' clothes

 Clothes for them to grow into....

Do you notice the hangers??

Well you see I have 3 girls, and I did not buy new hangers......

We have a LOT of pink and purple hangers.

We only bought white and blue when the other colors were gone.

My sweet hubby sorted all the hangers and told me I could not use any pink or purple for the boys' clothes.

He is pretty excited to have 2 sons :)

Warning.... Honesty exists in this post

See the title?? I feel the need to warn you that if you only enjoy the fairy tale stories, you should stop reading now.... I am going to discuss some of the truth about adoption.

Let me start by saying that I believe Adoption is a gift God has given.

I also believe that most things worth doing are not easy.

My husband and I were sitting down talking tonight after the kids went to bed.

He tells me that he is scared to bring the boys home.

He thought I was going to be mad at him for saying that.

Honestly, I am scared too.

Most people choose not to post that hard parts of adoption.... they choose to stick with the fairy tale version of the story. They are afraid that they will scare people away from adopting.... If what you read scares you, then maybe you might not be called to adopt, but that does not mean you cannot help. It does not get you off the hook for helping save the lives of these innocent children.

I imagine our first days will go something like this.

Adam so tiny and not used to getting liquids outside of 1 time a day will end up dehydrated and I will spend hours trying everything in my power to keep this tiny boy just the size of an infant at 6 years old as healthy as I can. Meanwhile Matthias will be trying to hit and bite his brother. You see Matthias is not an aggressive child, but he will be stuck in a world that is completely unfamiliar to him. We will be speaking all wrong. This language that neither of them understand. We will introduce foods that they may have never had before. Give them baths which they may have never experienced... Soap... this thing they have never heard of.

New sounds, new smells, new tastes, new language..... Every thing new.

People think, we are saving them. They will be so happy to be free from their orphanage.

WRONG!! They will be scared. We may see it as an awful place, but it is all they know!

Bad familiar is easier than good unfamiliar. 

So , we will be working hard to keep Adam out of the hospital (many kids from his orphanage end up in the hospital within days) and trying to keep Matthias calm.

Will we dare even leave the room?

Will we expose them to a little more of their culture before we head home?

Will they be miraculous and not have any problems?

How many time will I say "no" in their language?

Then after we are finally seeming to figure out a routine, we will load them up on a huge plane when they have barely even rode in a car and keep them out for over 24 hours. We will turn their nights into days and their days into nights. We will surround them with even more people who talk all wrong. These strange people will want to take pictures and hug them and love on them.

Neither of these boys, although 6 years old, can speak. They will not be able to communicate their fears, their needs, their wants.... anything.... I will be like a new mom to twins trying to figure out what they are wanting.

Will they cry? or are they so used to being ignored that they do not express needs or wants in any way.

Will it be a guessing game?

Then we have to try to find a routine as a family of 7....

Will the girls love helping with their brothers or will they be upset that they require so much of our time?

Will everything just fall into place and feel like they have always been home or will it feel as though we cannot do it?

Now let me tell you that adoption is a HUGE blessing in my life and I know that everything is going to work out, but my idea of working out (I kinda like the fairy tale version) and God's idea of working out (the not easy but worth it version) are very different.

I knew that this would be hard when we signed up and have been reminded very often!!! 

VERY VERY often...

Basically by everyone!!!

As my husband sat and discussed our main concerns we thought back to when we first had our children.

Kaitlyn was our first. She was born over 5 weeks early.....

That was not supposed to happen... First children often come late. People forgot to mention they sometimes come early.

We had just had the baby shower 5 days earlier. We had the bed, but it was not set up.

The list goes on and on!!!

She arrived and was perfect... well perfect in my eyes.

Family rallied and cleaned the house and put the nursery together while I was in the hospital.

Then the real fun began... She kept turning blue, she wasn't breathing, doctors calling me a paranoid first time mom, the throwing up, the jaundice and need for a biliblanket.... I could go on forever.

We probably had over 200 doctors visits and spent over $12,000 out of pocket in her first year of life, but she is completely worth it. At age 2, the doctors visits resumed and we discovered she was on the autism spectrum...... She is my oldest and is amazing... I wouldn't change a thing, but I would never have "asked" God for all those trials either.

Then Brittany was born less than 18 months after Kaitlyn. She was perfect. She slept, she never turned blue, she rarely cried.... I was like "yes, this is what I am talking about."

Then she couldn't sit up, couldn't crawl, couldn't walk...... the doctors were concerned.

Then she kept getting ear infections.... none of the medications were working...... 6 months of ear infection without a break. DAILY trips to the doctor for adult strength shots of antibiotics to clear the infection enough to put tubes in..... The tubes worked for 3 months then the infections started again, but the antibiotics helped this time.... Fast forward a few years. She is about to start school and we notice she is having trouble hearing. She is not following directions, but she speaks clearly.... what could it be??

Turns out she is partially deaf. 

Again, not what I would have asked for, but she has taught me so much!!

She is amazing... She can read lips with the best of them and most people have no clue until you put her on a softball team and she is out in the field..... Good luck with her reading your lips from there.

She is amazing.

Then my baby Alyssa was born. She was a huge 9lbs 3 oz. She ate well and kept on growing. She was amazing. When she was just 7 months old our lives flipped upside down.... She lost over 2 pounds in 10 days. She was miserably ill. Doctors had no idea what was happening. Nothing we did was helping her. Her blood counts were all out of control... Cancer?

I could not bear the thought.... allergy testing, exploratory surgeries, hematologists, oncologists, gastro docs and every type of doc you could imagine. Daily then every other day, then weekly and finally monthly trips to the lab for blood work which continues to this day.

Asthma, croup, RSV, infections etc..... She is always catching something.

Although she is sick and we take her to a lot of doctor's appts. She is perfect for our family.

She is amazing and each year she seems to be doing a little better.

God asked us to have not 3, but 5 special kiddos.

All kids have needs. My kids just get to have some "special" needs.

Why? Because God made them extra special then he blessed me with the strength, knowledge and ability to know how to help them. When I don't know how to help them, he answers my prayers and leads me in the right direction.

I choose to hope for the best, but plan for the worst when it comes to those first few days, weeks and months home.... God knows what will happen and he will give me the resources I need.....

Afterall, he gave me all of you right?

A week of Birthdays.... Let's Party!!!

April and May has always been crazy busy for our family where birthdays are concerned.

I have 2 sisters and they are both born in May along with my Grandpa (Papa)

Me and both of my grandmas are in April.....

Well I now have a niece and a nephew in April as well

AND I have 2 children with May birthdays!!

So during the next 7 days we have 4 actual birthdays and a birthday party (baptism too).

Sounds like time to party right?!?!

First, my sister, and best friend, Peggy turns 34 (Yep sis I went there :P ) in just 2 days.

She is 4 years older than me which made it hard when we were growing up.
We were always at different schools, had different friends, and we just.... different.
When she started high school, she went to a magnet school.
She wanted to study acting.
I was not really into acting, singing, dancing, music or anything the school focused on, so again we would be going to different schools.
You see, I was kinda a tom boy.... A friend of mine informed me that she would be attending my sister's school for technical theater. I didn't think about the fact that with all the performances they put on that somebody had to do the lights, sound and build the sets.... I was in.
That was, to me, the year that really strengthened our relationship.
I was a freshman and she was a senior. One of her best friends went their also, so I had more than 1 "in".
We had a great year. Hung out together quite and bit and really got to know each other so much better.
Our relationship has only grown stronger since then.
We were pregnant with our 2 youngest kids at the same time.
We were due 1 (yes ONE) day apart.
It was awesome experiencing it with her.
(funny fact... I have been pregnant with both my sisters and both my sisters in law)
Her son Alex (4 weeks old) and my chunky Alyssa (1 day old)
He was just over 5 lbs (I think) and Alyssa was 9lbs 3 oz

The nurses let my sister stay in the hospital with me, so when they would come to weigh the new baby, they would look at her tiny son and my chunky daughter and get confused.... It was awesome.

One of my favorite memories of my life.

My niece's birthday was last weekend, but her party is Saturday. She just turned 8 and is getting baptized!!!

She is pretty excited. Kaitlyn and her are 9 weeks apart. They have been best buddies since before they were born. My sister (in law, but we don't use that term) and I were due 5 weeks apart, but my stubborn Kait came 5 weeks early. I cannot believe they are 8 already!!

This was 2 years ago... Kaitlyn holding Alyssa, Ian (July baby with Britt), Natahen (Also April) Emily and Britt

This past Halloween Alyssa, Kaitlyn, Ian, Brittany and Emily

On May 7th my Grandpa..... Papa will be turning 84 years old

These pictures are from the last time I saw him.

Almost 2 years ago. We are going to see him next month.

He hates his picture taken, but I did not know how much time we had left with him, so I made him take lots of pictures... he even smiles in a few. Sad thing was this camera fell off a train and into a pond.... We fished for 2 hours and luckily recovered the camera. The camera was broken, but the pictures were worth saving!!

Then in just less than a week, my baby will be 4 years old.

I cannot believe how time has flown by. It was just yesterday she was born, or so it seems.

1 year old

2 years old

 3 years old

 My 2 little birthday girls snuggling.... Emmy almost 8 Alyssa almost 4

Then just one day apart from Alyssa her brother who is 1 day shy of 2 years older than her will be turning 6!

Sadly, he will spend one more birthday in an orphanage alone and without his family to celebrate with, but I take comfort in knowing this will be the last birthday that will go un-celebrated. 

Next year baby boy, We will shower you will love on your special day and do our best, every single day, to make up for the 6 years that you celebrated alone.

I learned that your birth parents loved you very much and they wanted you. 

Although they were educated people, they did not make enough money to pay for your medical care.

They had no choice but to leave you in the orphanage. 

They visited you for a while, but it became to hard.

They knew they could not take you home, so they stopped coming.

Seeing you in pain was just too much for them to bear.

I wish I had found you sooner baby, but you will be home soon.... Forever!

If you feel led to provide a gift for one or all of my birthday stars, please help us bring our boys home. 

Every single person listed in this post wants these babies home!!

Whether it's 4, 6, 8. 34, 74 or any amount in between, we truly appreciate all the love and support...

Let's party!!

What would a party be without party favors??

Well, let's see what I have....

Donate $10 or more and I will send you one of these

 Donate $15 or more, and I will send you some Chocolate from Europe

 Donate $20 or more, and I will send you one of these (designs may vary)

Donate $50 or more and I will make you one of these

You can donate through the donation box on the top right of my blog or click on this link

http://reecesrainbow.org/48978/sponsormitchell

Even if you cannot donate, can you write a little note to our all the birthday people especially our son and daughter!